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elkefetterolf

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All systems go. We are cleared for launch. If I go into labour now, they won't stop it. It could happen any where, any time. Kind of makes me feel like I'm about to go sky-diving, but I can't tell when the dude's gonna push me out of the plane.
Current Location:
insomniac city
Current Mood:
anxious overwhelmed and very pregnant
Current Music:
my gas, the dogs snore and the peaceful click of the keys
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Sebastian is here. All 129 lbs of him. He wriggles and he wiggles and he thwacks anything and everything with his tail. He's destroyed his crate bed and is currently lying at my feet doing his damnedest to make sure his chewy tire never rolls again. He constantly wonks his head on the desk, on the heater, on the bed and doesn't seem any the worse for wear. We've taken to calling him "Meathead." He's got horrific gas. He's only had two accidents since he got here -- both yesterday, and both while Shawn was out. Hurrah. A pup who only poos for me....

It's hard to remember that he's only 8 months old -- he doesn't know any better and if he were a smaller breed, it'd be so much easier to deal with -- you expect little fluffball puppies to have accidents and chew things they shouldn't. It doesn't help that he's already the size of a large Lab. His daddy was 240 lbs, and the breeder expects he'll get to be 220, at least. Good god.

However, he is a lovebug. He comes to see me in bed every time Shawn comes back with him. He snuffles his giant wet nose into the crook of my shoulder and just stands there, smelling me. His ears are floppy and even though he looks like a grown-up dog, he still has that undefinable puppy-smell.

I'm falling in love.
Current Mood:
content content
Current Music:
rubber chewy tire, begging for mercy
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Our puppy's coming home today! Our very own slobbering, drooling, teething, chewing, peeing little pup. Except that he's not so little -- 8 months old, and probably a 100 lbs or so. Regardless, I'm thrilled, as is Hub. I don't think the other two dogs will be at first. We set up his crate last night, and both dogs stared at in horror. Kate actually avoids being near it, as if she's afraid someone will scoop her up from behind and toss her in the big bad cage. Repeated assurances that she does not have to go in -- and even keeping the door closed have not helped. Currently, she's sitting in front of the heater, staring at the cage malevolently. She's so freakin' fantastic.

Our Thanksgiving was good. We hibernated here, just us and the dogs. As we have no heat, it's very difficult to induce us to get out of our cozy bed and go down to the frigid kitchen to make breakfast. Hub stalled and stalled and finally said we'd go out to breakfast. For future reference: there are no Middlebury restaurants that serve breakfast on Thanksgiving morning. Most of them aren't even open at all. Not the Indian restaurant, nor the 2 Chinese restaurants. Only the snooty restaurant that serves a "traditional New England Thanksgiving". Bah. Traditional, my lily-white keister. I bet they don't have green-bean casserole, made with all canned ingredients. We ate ham steaks and mashed potatoes. Hub made a fancy-dancy kind of stuffing, with white wine. Yum. Except that the wine didn't all boil off, so Hub wouldn't let me eat the stuffing -- too much alcohol, he said. He didn't eat it either.
Current Mood:
cold cold
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I just want you to know that I look for your name
every week, on the casualty list
I don't particularly care
where you are or if you're happy;
I rarely have things to tell you anymore
I just want to know you're not dead.
I tell myself I won't,
I'll just scroll through P, Q, R, and S
but my finger keeps going just to be sure
It doesn't tell me if you're maimed, torn, in agony
but at least your blue eyes are still open somewhere.
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so, my pelvis is separating early. We want the pelvis to separate, but not quite this much and not quite this early. I never knew that my pelvis was not a solid piece of bone, but it's not. It's four bones held together by ligaments, which stretch to enable the baby to pass through them. Good thing. But the stretchy ligaments mean that the bones now grind together and make it downright painful to walk or stand up or carry anything. So, I'm on moderate bedrest until further notice. There's no danger to the baby, so it's not a really strict bedrest -- I can get up to go to the bathroom, or go get something to drink -- I can move around when and if I feel I can. The more moving around, the more resting I have to do later. So, this pretty much sucks. I've been knitting like a fiend for the past two weeks, and my hands are beginning to hurt. I've already read all the books I own, and am about to start the 2nd one Sabatina lent me. Our computer is fairly useless as a DVD player. whine whine whine whine

In other respects, I feel great. I've finally gained some weight (a whole 5 lbs, which means I'm still down 6 lbs from where I started) and I can generally eat real food, which is exciting.
Current Mood:
bored bored silly
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so, I've been stressing out about this for quite some time -- pretty much since I got pregnant... I mean, 1) I HATE parties where people stare at me, 2) I'm not really speaking to the vast majority of my family 3) I'm not so much up on parties where people are supposed to buy you shit just 'cause you've invited them. Excellent recipe for party fun. Ideally, it'd just be my favorite women together to drink virgin bloody marys or some such and giggle together. But, at 2:15am, as I was tallying up who consitutes my favorite women, there's like maybe 10 of them, 6 of which won't be able to make it. And that kind of makes me sad. So, I've decided to go with the half of my family that I'm speaking to (the Boyden side) and whom I think are really quite swell, plus various and sundry other gals that I love. Of course, the other side of the fam is going to get wicked f*ckin' pissed when they hear I've had a shower and not invited them, but screw 'em. If the thought of them being there is enough to stress me out to wake me up at 2:15am, then I don't want them there.

in other news, Hub bought me an iPod. Christ. I really have become a yuppie, haven't I?
Current Mood:
determined determined
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so, I'm having a rough day today. It's cold here, and I can't get anything to go right and I miss my Hub and my pelvis hurts and my dogs won't leave me alone and I'm just crying at the drop of a hat. I went to put on my new overalls, and the straps got all tangled, and I couldn't get them to cooperate and I just burst into tears. I had this sudden memory of my darling friend Mac who's just found me again after 5 years. He's a big guy with a big heart, and there was a time when we were inseperable. We nursed each other through some pretty nasty broken hearts. We both got our hearts trampled at about the same time, and for some reason, though I had never spoken to him before, I sent him an e-mail that said something on the lines of "I'm miserable and you're miserable, and why don't we be miserable together. I can't sleep anymore so if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm pretty much awake all the time now." And a few nights later, I got a phone call at 3am -- it was Mac, and he was really upset and just wanted someone to talk to -- so I threw my parka on over my PJs and sprinted to his dorm, and we stayed up the rest of the night talking and crying. I've never felt I could trust someone in so short a time. Everyone else thought we were secretly sleeping together, but we weren't. We pretty much vaulted straight into a brother/sister-type situation. I'm so happy he's back.

Anyway, the memory. I was having a rotten day, crying due to encounter with my cause of my aforementioned broken heart. I had to go to rehearsal (Mac and I were in the same choir) and as I get there, I see Mac, who's looking at me strangely and I can tell he's about to give me shit for something. But he must have seen in my face how upset I was, because he just came over and smiled at me, and very gently unhooked and untwisted my overall straps, hooked them back up and gave me a big hug. My memory is going to hell these days, but I can remember his face so clearly as he did that.
Current Mood:
lonely lonely and nostalgic.
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Last night, went to see the UVM/Michigan Tech game with darlin' Sapienzer and the Palmers. UVM got creamed, again, which was so heartening and thrilling to watch.

Still no luck with the kerosene heater. I don't dare test my luck with it. So, luckily, I've stocked up on long sleeve shirts and longjohns and we're using the smaller propane heater. Last night, I was so scared the dogs were going to freeze. How much cold do you suppose a dog can take?

Current Mood:
cold cold
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The sproglet is dancing up a storm right underneath my bellybutton.

Who needs TV when I can watch my belly roll and shake as my kid giggles and boogies?

The pups are lying on the same couch, curled up with Kate's head on Yeager's belly, both fast asleep. I wish my camera was right next to me, because I know if I get up, they'll wake up and move.

If it weren't so dang cold, I'd pretty much be in a domestically enhanced state of bliss right now.

Current Mood:
happy happy
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Too much to write about, and not enough energy to do so.

The trip was fabu -- Got our very first "belly pics" at the Colloseum = very cool. Paris really stole my heart.

The sproglet kicked loudly and definitively for the very first time while on a boat trip on the Seine, right at we got to the Eiffel Tower. Even Hub got to feel it, which was just amazing.

And now, I feel the sproglet kicking pretty much all the time. Big throbbing thumps all around my belly -- it basically feels like giant rolling gas. Sometimes if its on the outside wall, you can feel it. But to be able to feel something thumping on your lower intestine is just surreal. And, by now, my lower intestine, along with all my other organs, is pretty much up in my ribcage. I was horrified to learn that. No wonder I can't eat a big meal.

Current Mood:
calm calm
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